If the idea of being husband to a woman wasn’t as inconceivably foreign of a possible reality for me, the idea of being a father was even more so! Oh yeah, as kids we played “house”, pretending to be mommies and daddies. We also pretended to be dogs, policemen, army men etc ! It was all just child’s play !
This was real-life now and I didn’t exactly have much real-life experience to draw from to be successful at being a husband much less a father! But … I was still on some sort of a “roll”. My life had taken quite some miraculous turns leaving me “drunk”on mountain top experiences! Things just kept working out well for me in spite of my past and all of its’ baggage.
After having my epiphany while in prison that I was not born gay, the possibility of marrying a woman came with the obvious potential of having children, albeit a long shot, considering I would turn 39 the month I was released from prison. Besides, given my history, what woman would want me to father her children !
Along comes Carina, fully aware of my history, who was then at the beginning of child rearing years! She also expressed her desire to have a family- perhaps three or four children, she said. Well, coming from a family with three siblings, that didn’t sound outlandish to me. By the time that discussion would come up, we were already pretty well committed to getting married and I probably would have agreed to almost anything at that point!
Again, I was “on a roll” in my new life! If God was bringing this sweet, young beauty into my life, interested in marrying me, who was I to question whether I’d be a good father? I didn’t feel ready for all that but seeing what God had brought me through and where he was placing me at that time; seeing the impossible in my life become reality-in spite of myself and where I had steered my life ; I almost felt as if I was just along for the ride! I figured God would give us girls which wouldn’t pose a temptation for me, and He would continue healing and growing me so I would be ready by the time we started a family. We both agreed that we would wait three years before trying to start a family.
Our marriage got off to a good start with no major problems. We were heavily involved at our Fellowship Church where we had met and married. We transitioned from the singles group to the young married’s group, making fast friends in the small-group from that class. I continued seeking every growth opportunity offered with the men’s group, also continuing our breakfast meetings with my original Men’s Fraternity small group outside the church planned groups and activities.
My Business, ( remodeling homes) was booming and I continued improving our own fixer-upper. We were able to purchase a used car for Carina thanks to the savings she had built up. She was nannying two toddler girls who lived near each other at their home. We were starting from scratch so we had much to acquire to fill our home, so that job kept her occupied and helped fill our home. Regrettably, I entered marriage with more debt than I would have preferred. I was paying off the truck, the honeymoon credit card, a sectional sofa, the house, and some back taxes I owed.
About nine months into her job nannying the two girls, we had our first little “speed bump”. Carina lost that job when the girls’ parents were informed by the neighborhood association that I was a registered sex offender. Seems the crime patrol, noticing the strange car in the neighborhood, ran the license plate- which was registered in my name.
We had celebrated our first anniversary while on our first missionary trip on the Amazon River. Word got out of said occasion and the ships’ cook made us an anniversary cake for a little surprise party thrown for us! The ten day trip was a very memorable experience. A professional photographer who was on the team took notice of Carina’s photos and after the trip, offered her a job as an assistant on his team! That turned out to be a far more desirable job for her and paid much better!
Three years flew by and we agreed that we were ready to start a family. I had successfully completed my parole, the debt was whittled down quite a bit and we felt confident enough in our marriage to add children to the mix. About four months later Carina was expecting! We decided to have the baby at Baylor due to their long history of delivering babies and for the relatively close proximity to our home. Carina did her prenatal care there and we participated in the birthing classes together. Her pregnancy progressed normally once she got past the rather nasty morning sickness!
Soon enough, the time came for the sonogram and identification of the gender; We were having a baby BOY! Now we had to decide on a name. It would be a biblical name with appropriate meaning. After reviewing many names, we settled on Samuel; “asked of God” or “heard by God.”We chose George, my father’s name as well as both of my grandfathers, for his middle name.
April 24, 2008 would mark the beginning of our family with Samuel’s birth. Carina started having some labor pains the evening before, but she decided they were Braxton Hicks contractions and retired to bed. That next day after lunch she decided we’d take a walk around the block to try to get the labor started. It worked like a charm and her contractions increased significantly, very quickly! As advised during birthing class, she waited until the contractions were 5 minutes apart to head to the hospital. By the time we arrived she had progressed to contractions every one minute, even though her water hadn’t broken.
When we walked into the main entrance of labor and delivery, no one was at the reception desk, nor was there anyone to be found anywhere! Finally, a nurse emerged from behind the locked doors to delivery and escorted us into a pre-delivery exam room. One Quick look and the nurse exclaimed, “ oh honey, you’re ready! “
I think we left for the hospital at about 1:30 pm and Samuel was born just after two! There was no time for an epidural so Carina had an all natural labor and they had to break her water! I was by her side holding her hand and encouraging her.
Inconceivable…!
Our precious Samuel !
…sweet sixteen!
what a blessing to read how God has moved in your life and the blessing you have in two amazing sons and a loving wife.